What if the very regrets you’ve been running from are actually the soil where your true calling can grow?
Regret is one of the heaviest emotions we carry. It whispers if only, it replays what might have been, and it chains us to choices we cannot undo. For most of us, regret feels like wasted ground—a barren field of mistakes and missed chances. But what if regret is not a wasteland? What if it is fertile soil—rich with lessons, insights, and experiences that prepare you for your calling?
The paradox is this: what you thought disqualified you may be the very thing that equips you.
Why We Fear Regret
We resist regret because it feels like failure stamped into memory.
- It accuses. Regret tells you you’ve wasted too much time.
- It shames. Regret insists you’ll never recover.
- It paralyzes. Regret convinces you it’s too late to start again.
And so, instead of digging into the soil, we avoid it. We pretend it isn’t there. But buried within regret are nutrients of wisdom that cannot grow anywhere else.
Regret as Fertile Ground
In White Flagging: The Surprising Power of Winning by Surrender, Dr. Val Ukachi shows how surrender transforms what we once saw as weakness into unexpected strength. Waving the white flag over regret doesn’t erase the past—but it redeems it.
Regret becomes fertile ground when we stop resisting it and start reframing it. Instead of letting it chain us, we let it change us.
What Grows From Regret
- Clarity. Regret teaches you what matters most by showing you what you lost when you ignored it.
- Compassion. Regret softens judgment toward others because you know the pain of mistakes.
- Wisdom. Regret provides hard-earned insight that no textbook can offer.
- Purpose. Regret fuels passion to help others avoid your path—or recover when they don’t.
The very field that once looked barren becomes the soil of transformation.
Stories of Regret Reframed
- The Leader. He regretted years of selfish ambition that damaged relationships. That regret birthed his calling as a mentor to young leaders, teaching them to value people over power.
- The Parent. She carried deep regret over lost time with her children. Instead of living in shame, she used that regret to fuel a ministry for families, helping others prioritize presence over productivity.
- The Survivor. He regretted destructive choices that cost him years of freedom. Yet that same regret became the soil for his calling as an advocate, guiding others out of cycles of self-destruction.
In every story, regret wasn’t the end. It was the beginning of something meaningful.
How to Turn Regret Into Calling
- Face It Honestly. Stop denying or burying it. Regret loses its poison when you name it.
- Wave the White Flag. Say: I release the shame of this regret. I allow it to become my soil, not my prison.
- Ask What It Taught You. Write down the lessons regret etched into your story.
- Look for Who Needs It. Your story of regret may be the roadmap someone else needs.
- Plant Something New. Use the wisdom regret gave you to fuel your next step.
Why This Is Hard
Because regret feels final. It convinces you that your story is over. But the truth is, regret is not a gravestone—it’s a seedbed. Seeds only grow after they’re buried. In the same way, your calling can only grow after regret has been surrendered and reframed.
The Prosperity of Regret Redeemed
When regret becomes soil, it produces a prosperity beyond achievement:
- Peace. You no longer carry shame—you carry wisdom.
- Purpose. Your past becomes the platform for your calling.
- Freedom. Regret no longer enslaves you—it empowers you.
- Hope. You realize nothing is wasted—not even mistakes.
This prosperity doesn’t erase the past. It transforms it.
Final Thought
Regret doesn’t have to be your prison. It can be your soil. The things you thought disqualified you may be the very things preparing you for your calling.
So stop running from regret. Dig into it. Wave the white flag over it. And let it become the ground where your true calling takes root.
👉 Discover how surrender turns regret into fertile soil for your calling in White Flagging: The Surprising Power of Winning by Surrender. Order your copy here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FJ9R8Y4Q