Not everyone who claims to be a guide is meant to lead you.
The voices you listen to will shape your spiritual journey. Some will push you toward God’s purpose for your life, while others can mislead you, keeping you stuck or confused. Choosing the right mentor isn’t just about finding someone knowledgeable—it’s about discerning whether they are truly sent by God.
The wrong mentor can hinder your growth, fill you with wrong doctrine, or lead you into spiritual bondage. But the right mentor? They will sharpen your faith, challenge you to grow, and push you closer to God.
So how do you discern the right spiritual mentors? Let’s break it down.
1. Do They Live What They Preach?
“Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?”
A mentor’s life should reflect the truth they teach. If their words and actions don’t align, that’s a sign of spiritual inconsistency. Watch for:
✔ A strong personal relationship with God
✔ Integrity and honesty in their dealings
✔ A pattern of growth and spiritual maturity
✔ Stability in their personal and spiritual life
Anyone can say the right things, but how do they live when no one is watching?
2. Do They Lead You to God or Themselves?
A true mentor’s goal is to guide you closer to God, not create dependence on them.
✔ Do they encourage you to seek God for yourself?
✔ Do they point to Scripture rather than personal opinions?
✔ Do they promote Christ, or do they seek glory for themselves?
“I must decrease, that He may increase.”
If a mentor makes themselves the source of wisdom and power instead of directing you to God, they are not leading you correctly.
3. Do They Challenge and Correct You in Love?
A good mentor doesn’t just motivate you—they correct you when necessary.
✔ Do they lovingly tell you the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable?
✔ Do they hold you accountable for your spiritual walk?
✔ Are they willing to challenge wrong beliefs or behaviors?
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”
If someone only tells you what you want to hear, they are not mentoring you—they are pacifying you.
4. Do They Have Spiritual Discernment?
A mentor should have the ability to recognize spiritual deception, warfare, and divine opportunities.
✔ Do they give wise, biblically sound advice?
✔ Are they aware of spiritual attacks and how to overcome them?
✔ Do they encourage you to develop discernment for yourself?
“But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.”
Without discernment, they can misguide you—even with good intentions.
5. Are They Accessible and Willing to Invest Time?
Spiritual mentorship isn’t just about knowledge—it’s about relationship.
✔ Do they make time to listen and guide you?
✔ Are they approachable when you need counsel?
✔ Do they genuinely care about your spiritual well-being?
A mentor who is too busy, distant, or emotionally unavailable may not be able to truly invest in your growth.
6. Is Their Teaching Grounded in the Bible?
“Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.”
True spiritual mentors teach and live by the Word of God.
✔ Do they prioritize Scripture over personal opinions?
✔ Is their doctrine sound and free from compromise?
✔ Do they emphasize obedience, faith, and holiness?
If their teachings contradict Scripture, they are not the right mentor.
7. Do They Display the Fruits of the Spirit?
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance.”
A mentor should exhibit spiritual maturity through their character. Look for:
✔ Love – Are they compassionate and patient?
✔ Humility – Do they acknowledge their own need for growth?
✔ Wisdom – Do they lead with discernment and sound judgment?
✔ Peace – Do they carry a calm, stable spirit?
If they are consistently prideful, impatient, or harsh, they are not the right guide for your journey.
8. Are They Led by the Holy Spirit?
A mentor should be Spirit-led, not just relying on personal experiences or opinions.
✔ Do they pray before giving advice?
✔ Are they sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading?
✔ Do they encourage you to seek God’s voice above theirs?
“For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.”
If a mentor lacks spiritual sensitivity, they may give you worldly wisdom instead of divine direction.
9. Are They More Concerned About Your Soul Than Your Success?
Some mentors focus on gifting, ministry success, or influence, but neglect spiritual health.
✔ Do they care about your walk with God more than your status?
✔ Do they encourage humility even as you grow?
✔ Do they emphasize character over achievements?
“What shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?”
If a mentor prioritizes fame, wealth, or influence over spiritual depth, they can lead you astray.
10. Do They Inspire You to Grow Spiritually?
A mentor should ignite your hunger for more of God.
✔ Do they push you to pray more?
✔ Do they challenge you to step out in faith?
✔ Do they inspire you to be bold in your calling?
“Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.”
If a mentor’s guidance leaves you stagnant, they are not truly sharpening you.
Final Thoughts: Be Discerning
Not everyone who speaks well, teaches well, or is popular is meant to mentor you.
✔ Seek mentors who reflect Christ, not themselves.
✔ Choose those who challenge, correct, and guide in love.
✔ Ensure they have spiritual depth, wisdom, and discernment.
✔ Be prayerful—God will confirm the right mentors for you.
“There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.”
The right mentor won’t just give you knowledge—they will guide you into a deeper relationship with God.
Now, ask yourself: Who is truly mentoring your spirit?